Ol' Pete sat in his office, outlining a defensive game plan for Sunday night. His defensive coaches would fill in the details throughout the week. The offensive game plan, he felt, could wait. There are only so many running plays in this world to choose from, anyway. The Seahawk was fretting, per usual. The Niners. … Continue reading Seattle Noir: The Mole and the Golden Calculator
Saturday, December 7th, 2019 -- the day before the Rams game The board on the table in the middle of the room resembled a chess set. 32 figures sat atop it, arranged in a complicated pattern. The board itself was covered in inscrutable markings; there was no way for anyone to know what any of … Continue reading Deus Ex Ramchina
I arrive at Uncle Boomer’s house. He doesn’t appear to have obtained any new furniture since 1989, except for a TV approximately the size of an Olympic pool that has been mounted to the wall. His house has five bedrooms and a kitchen/dining room combo large enough to host a moderately-sized wedding reception. He lives … Continue reading Seahawks Sunday with Uncle Boomer
CARL SAGAN: Hello, I’m Carl Sagan. You may remember me best as someone who worked tirelessly to promote and popularize science, especially through my Cosmos series. NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: And I’m Neil deGrasse Tyson. You probably know me best for my pedantic “well, actually” tweets from hell. SAGAN: Alas, I am dead now, but my … Continue reading Cosmos: The San Fran Nebula
The local Seattle football team made the championship game! No, not the Seahawks. The other football: “soccer.” Your Seattle Sounders FC will play for the MLS Cup next Sunday, and you should put in a shift of support for the boys on the pitch. It’s a championship game, and the Sounders are one of the … Continue reading Watch the Sounders, dorks
This week, the Seattle Seahawks play the Baltimore Ravens, and there’s a lot going on: Earl Thomas returning to Seattle, the chance to get to 6-1 for only the second time in franchise history, the endless fight for beak supremacy, etc. But an extremely important topic that people are starting to rumble about has nothing … Continue reading What’s Up With Michael Dickson?
Monday - Manager's OfficeThe Seahawk sat quietly as Ol' Pete worked busily to outline a defensive strategy for Thursday night. Once it was complete, he’d work with the staff to craft the full game plan. The offensive strategy, he felt, could wait. There were only so many running plays to choose from. The Seahawk was … Continue reading Seattle Noir: The Downfall of Babyface