Football is the dumbest sport there is.
Because of this, you can have your geriatric kicker fuckin’ Charlie-Brown it onto his ass during warm-ups, miss an extra point, then allow a kickoff teeder via business decision.
Because of this, your opponent can run essentially the exact same concept against your defense and kick your ass with it every time.
Because of this, you can be flagged for pass interference despite playing perfect defense on two separate occasions and pick up what appeared to be a new league record for back-breaking offensive holding calls.
Because of this, you can watch your offense execute their two-minute drill by running draw plays in long-yardage situations at the end of both halves.
Because of this, your defensive unsung hero can get hurt minutes after forcing a fumble, leaving your deep coverage to an ice skater playing on grass and a dude wearing Marshawn Lynch’s number.
Football is dumb, which is exactly why you and I will come crawling back to it on Sunday night next week.
Because it’s not football that’s dumb, it’s us.
Listen to our newest episode of Tasteful Profanity with Benjamin Allbright right here!